Tuesday, 6 May 2014

Private Investigations

     Today is a day like any other and yet I felt like sharing some thoughts with you.
      I am 20 yo but I feel like I'm soon to go on pension. It sounds funny when I reread it, but it's a sad smile that it brings on my face.
     Life is joyful, fun, speedy and with no worries when in 20's- at least that's what they all say. So why doesn't it feel like this then? The answer is simple "You've got problems in your head, girl". Do I? Maybe...
     I just wish to remember how is that to be young, that's all.
     I want to make stupid mistakes and to laugh about them the next day and I want to feel happy about stupid things like a new, fantastic cake I've tried or because of a super hot pair of shoes or about an exam I've passed, or a nice game I won, or maybe a cool date I've been on. Well, as depressing as it may sound, I don't feel any happiness about all those things, only sadness if they don't happen.
     What is this point I got to? I can't explain to myself, but I'm so tired of being sad, it's like I'm waiting for minutes, hours, days, years to pass faster so I could finally get a grave. So fuc*ing optimistic, right? Well, that's how it's been lately.
     Maybe it's a bad idea- this post, but it might be as well just another stupid thing to laugh about tomorrow, right?


"And what have you got at the end of the day?
What have you got to take away?
A bottle of whisky and a new set of lies
Blinds on the windows and a pain behind the eyes
Scarred for life - nocompensation
Private investigations."

11 comments:

  1. Maybe u should listen aria... i think we'll have nice days in iasi open, of course only if u want to. take care :-* 10 for the post!

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  2. It seems chessplayers suffer from this mindset more than others. I wish I had the answer. I feel this way too, sometimes (most times?!).

    -Seth

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    Replies
    1. Hello! This is Hiber once more, your fan from Uruguay! I felt worried after I read your post. You´ve got a family and friends who love you. You are young, healthy and can live the life you chose and many would like to. (Including myself!) going to different countries to know other cultures, play chess and make friends. So...do not let you down! A friend in the distance but always next to you: Hiber

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  3. Esti un om minunat. Drumul catre titlul mondial este anevoios si plin de framantari de tot felul. Spor la antrenamente in continuare si sa-ti pazesti inima de orice tristete!

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    Replies
    1. Multumesc mult! Imi e foarte placut sa citesc astfel de comentarii :)

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    2. Cu placere! Si eu iti multumesc mult ca mi-ai raspuns! esti o sahista cu un talent minunat si ai toate calitatile ca sa devi campioana mondiala. Te rog sa iti intaresti inima si să nu mai discuti cu gandurile negative. Nu mai primi nici un gand rau in mintea ta, nu mai discuta cu aceste ganduri! Ca sa devi campiona mondiala trebuie mai intai sa faci acest antrenament mental, sa-ti cureti mintea de gandurile negative. Cand mintea este limpede si luminoasa atunci inima este puternica. Si o inima puternica joaca sah dumnezeieste. Spor la antrenamente!

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  4. Who is Luca???

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  6. Luca! Everyone wait for the next message from you!

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  7. It seems you have finally got the freedom you desired. We provide private investigation service in and around Florida.

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  8. Loved this post and shared it with all my colleagues. Thank you so much!
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    ReplyDelete